Dieting under stress

1 Day

Ingredients

QuantityIngredient
½Grapefruit
1sliceWhole wheat toast, dry
8ouncesSkim milk
4ouncesLean broiled chicken breast
1cupSteamed spinach
1cupHerb tea
1Oreo cookie
Rest of Oreos in the package
2pintsRocky Road ice cream
1Jar hot fudge sauce
Nuts
Cherries
Whipped cream
2Loaves garlic bread with cheese
1largeSausage, mushroom & cheese pizza
4cansBeer OR
1largePitcher of beer
3Milky Way or Snickers Candy bars

Directions

BREAKFAST

LUNCH

MIDAFTERNOON SNACK

DINNER

Rules for this diet:

1. If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories. 2.

If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are cancelled out by the diet soda. 3. When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if you don't eat more than they do. 4. Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER count, such as hot chocolate,

brandy, toast, and Sara Lee Cheesecake 5. If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner. 6. Movie related foods do not have additional calories because they are part of the entire entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel. (Example: Milk Duds, Buttered Popcorn, Junior Mints, Red Hots, or Tootsie Rolls). 7. Cookie pieces contain no calories. The process of breaking causes

calorie leakage. 8. Things licked off knives or spoons have no calories if you are in the

process of preparing something. Examples: peanut butter on a knife while making sandwiches or ice cream on a spoon while making a sundae. 9. Foods that have the same color have the same number of calories.

Examples are spinach and pistachio ice cream or mushrooms and white chocolate.

NOTE: Chocolate is a universal color and may be substitited for any other food color.

Source: Marlisa Brown, Wadsworth, Ohio Marlisa, who works in one of our plants, faxed this to me today at work, and it's very amusing. I thought I'd share it with you guys. It seems to sum up my philosophy of dieting pretty well...

* The Polka Dot Palace - The BBS for Homemakers! 1-201-822-3627 Posted by LISA on 09-07-95

Posted to MC-Recipe Digest V1 #709 by Lisa Clarke <lisa@...> on Aug 1, 9